Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Desire and Husbands

I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you. Genesis 3:16 [NIV]

After Adam and Eve disobey God, creation, which had been orderly and without blemish, becomes disorderly and flawed. Eve will experience pain in childbirth, and her “desire” will be for her husband. In the Hebrew language, the word desire encompasses much more than the idea of longing. The entire soul or essence of the person is involved. Therefore, this passage suggests that Eve’s sense of herself, emotionally and physically, will become dependent on her husband.

General Editor Jean E. Syswerda, NIV Women of Faith Study Bible, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Mischigan, 2001, pg 10


  1. Hm, this one has me questioning. We think that women should be able to "stand on their own two feet" and not rely on a man or anyone for such things. The woman described here would be seen as very weak and clingy in the world. Perhaps I don't understand.

  2. Provocative post! Thanks Donna.

    April - I take a different perspective.

    I have learned that while a marriage is comprised of two individuals it does not require one weak and one strong; one dominant and one subservient; one powerful and one weak; one free and one slave. Yet, as every partnership (in government, in business, in task, in endeavor) requires that one be designated as leader - so did God assign man as that leader.

    That assignment does in NO way diminish the responsibility or capability of the woman. Such misunderstanding is a tool of the devil used to confound the purposes of God.

    I am not weak or clingy - and, yes - my desire is to my husband and he does rule over me. He confers with me, he listens to me and he accommodates me. I pray that it will always be thus.

  3. I really love this insight. For me it means that a woman cannot even begin to exercise her priesthood responsibility of giving physical birth until she becomes one or consecrated to her spouse. Her desire is to receive what is needed so that she can become a co-creator with a God.

  4. Heavenly Father was not cursing Eve, but making a grand & glorious statement about her natural True Love for her husband, as will be the case with most women for their husbands, especially if the woman is righteous. It had nothing to do with her having to feel dependant on him, but she will naturally give her whole heart & soul to her husband & make him the center of her world. As he should her also, but it is not as natural for men to have such love, only righteous men have such True Love, the same as comes naturally for women.

    The phrase, 'he shall rule over thee', also has nothing to do with dominance or decision making or authority or power to rule more than the wife does. They are completely equal in every way. Heavenly Father was just so grateful to Eve & her willingness & courage to take the brave step into mortality & Motherhood & lead Adam to do the same, that he wanted to reassure her that she would be taken care of in her new vulnerable state.

    By the word 'rule', He was stating that her husband would protect her & provide for her & do all things for her according to her desires & needs, above all else, especially above himself & his own needs & desires.

    Heavenly Father commands men to submit to their wives 1st & listen to her & give their life & whole heart to her & put her needs, desires & wishes 1st above all else, even his own, before he ever asks a wife to submit & do the same for the husband. True Love is the requirement for men 1st & then the woman can trust to stay with him & give the same in return.

    The husband & wife are completely equal, not only is it a falsehood that men have more authority or power or 'the last say', but righteous men understand their obligation & they have the desire to give the woman everything she wants in every decision. They understand she has just as much authority & power from God in the marriage & home as he does. He knows he is there to serve her every wish as she gives & risks her life & heart for him & their children. If the man is righteous the woman will feel safe to do the same in return & listen to him & fulfill all his desires & wishes.

    With this kind of Celestial Marriage they come to the 'Divine Dilemma', where each wants to do the will of the other.